Tuesday, June 7, 2011

A Note to Pain

Pain hurts especially when I'm trapped in my Box.

Pain breaks us ( family, friends and relationships) into two. Pain kills us a little everyday and there’s nothing we can do. Pain shapes us, transforms us into people we thought we’d never be or sometimes people we always wanted to be.

Pain seeps into our lives suddenly, when we least expect it. Pain tricks us into thinking that we can’t take it anymore or that our skin isn’t thick enough to endure it.

Pain cuts through us like a butcher’s knife and we let it. We feed our pain. We listen to sad songs, hold on to memories, watch depressing movies and run towards pain knowing that this is how it’ll all end; tears, sleepless nights, and scars we bury deep. Death, a lost love, distance, abandonment, and a lot more bring us to our knees praying to have the strength to get up again.

After every blow we take, we promise ourselves we’d never give in to the pain again, but as the days go by and as we meet more beautiful people, experience life further, and choose to become who we are today, we risk getting hurt. We risk being vulnerable, we risk inflicting pain on ourselves but then again we talk ourselves into it like we can handle the consequences. Like we’re superman, pain is nothing to us. Like regrets don’t exist and like scars are teachers in disguise.

Like a little kid learning to ride a bike, falling down and getting up again till they get it right, pain pushes us forward; pain makes us appreciate peace of mind.

Pain makes us appreciate wholeness of the heart, pain makes us appreciate our lives and it makes us appreciate ourselves for getting out of every painful experience whole again. Even when we’re missing a piece, we tell ourselves that this was meant to be, that pain was destined to happen, that pain taught us a lesson we had to learn the hard way!

Dear Pain, Hurt and Grieve,

Thank you for making me the beautiful person that I am. Thank you for teaching me everything I know. Thank you for showing me that my Red Flags are alerting my in-the-box momements. Thank you for turning my weaknesses into strengths, my precious moments into memories, my heart into a beating drum, my eyes into a well, and my body into a castle that holds a wealth of stories on every corner.

Right now, all I can do is kiss you goodbye, because what I'm sure of is that from out the box, you are my strength to making a choice I need to make.

Broken down, but getting up again!

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